the sputtering saga continues

08Sep09

I haven’t had much luck so far with the internet dating–no dates have yet occurred or even been planned. I don’t seem to be generating much interest from the males of the Match.com population. Boys–seriously? Do I have to be the one with all the balls in this situation? Because I got no problem sending some winks your way, but I’d appreciate it a couple of you step up to the plate too. Mkay?

By far the most amusing aspect thus far of this little experiment has been the messages I get from people who clearly are not my type of guy at all.

First of all, proper grammar and punctuation are huge turn-ons for me. I find that I don’t mind an occasional misusage of your/you’re, or even they’re/there/their. But text speak earns you an automatic “Ha. No.” Sorry, fellas. I don’t even use text speak in actual texts the majority of the time, why would I condone its usage in emails?

The very first message I got was actually on Match (if you’ll recall, thus far I’ve stuck with OKCupid as well). I got a wink from an older gentleman. And by older, I mean old enough to be my father. And, to be perfectly blunt, that’s too old for me. I’m not looking for a sugar daddy. Sorry. So I sent him a polite no, thanks (that’s actually an option when someone winks at you. Who knew?). And I got a message back from this guy saying something along the lines of “Gee, thanks for whizzing past my profile. I can’t help it if you’re so dog-gone good looking.”

Uh, how about a little graciousness, sir. You do realize that you’re older than my mother, right? I very nearly sent him a return message saying just exactly that, but I thought better of it. I don’t really want to start a dialogue with the dude.

Although I have noticed that he seems to keep checking out my profile. Creepy.

Most of the other messages that amused the shit outta me have come through OKCupid. I guess you get what you pay for.

One guy, I am not even kidding, started out his message asking me why I get called Wednesday. “Is that like a stripper name or something?”

Wow. Really? No. *delete*

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3 Responses to “the sputtering saga continues”

  1. 1 SteveB

    Sigh….. what a drag. When I was on my own, I actually had some success with eHarmony — which sounds all cheezy-scientific, but seemed to do a better job of selecting people that are willing to put a little more effort into communication than “hey your picture looks hot.”

    Good luck!

  2. Oh Wednesday, you dirty minx. Your handle just oozes impropriety. Maybe you should change it to Pussy Galore or something less misleading. *headdesk*

    However, if you were trolling Craigslist, you’d be getting pictures of unwashed dick, so…silver lining?

  3. As a card-carrying male, I confess that most men are complete idiots.
    The thought of a man my age cruising dating sites and hitting on women half his age (or younger) is just downright embarrassing to those in our tribe who still have self-esteem.
    I do hope that you have better luck, Lizzie. You deserve all the good.


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